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让你光芒四射的是你的特长

M是我的朋友,很普通很宅的一个工科男生,就像你在全国众多女生稀少的理工科院校里看到的任何一个留着平头穿着免费赠送的T恤和看起来木木的男生一样,而他似乎还要格外笨拙一些,遇到需要说话的场合,常常仰着脖子,抽着喉咙半天无法表达。怎么好交那些明艳动人的同校女生?他只在高中同学中找了一个也有点喜欢她的女生,谈着一段不咸不淡的异地恋。只是,他还是有些不一样的。当别的男生忙着参加社团发掘自己的特长时,他正在钻研一道道微积分难题,当别的男生由于苦闷无聊等种种原因打游戏喝酒时,他把高等代数又看了一遍,当别的男生换了好几个女友创了几次业兼了几份职时他的计算机编程课终于拿了90分。他很刻苦,总是舍得在学习上花时间,总是不会被花花世界所打动,在自己的象牙塔里笃定地攀爬者。大三一统计成绩,竟然是班级第三,败在天分上,他不够聪明,一道题要比别人多想十遍。本来要推研到一个还算不错的学校,但临时被一个看起来更聪明发展更全面的同学替代掉了。他十月份开始考研,还是那么一天学足十几个小时,后来就去了全国最好的那几所大学中的一所。据说去了去读研究生也还是常在课题上遇到关卡,在土著同学的秒懂中发现自己的迟钝。但胜在勤奋好学勤问,跌跌撞撞竟然一路拿了优秀毕业生,去了一家很厉害的单位,一年时间还了上学这几年借的钱,然后和女友汇合,准备买房结婚生子的事情。再过几年见到他竟然成了不大不小的领导,也不再说话张口结舌,眉宇之间有种淡定的气质,已经和以前判若两人,讲起专业知识侃侃而谈,哪有当年的局促和土气。同学之间属于他的走向最稳定最好了,现在同学会都是他在组织。他和我讲起从前,我钦佩他对方向的把握和对事情的取舍,他双眼发着光说:“哪有什么选择,我一无所长,只有学习这一块下下功夫还可以稍微出点成绩,已经拼尽了全力,做兼职搞社团什么的既玩不来又没有精力。”后来听说他是国内那个专业方向的佼佼者,时常参加各种国内外会议,当年的女友已经转正成妻,一家子和和满满,正准备借政策之东风生第二个小孩。

L是我的姐姐,大概还是有一些语言的天赋的,在数理化科目常常倒数的情况下,英语是她唯一的相对长的特长。长辈们见到她的这份心情见面时也总夸她英语好。她是昏天暗地地苦学英语,每篇课文都一字一句地硬记下来,然后总算可以考到130分左右,在普通中学这门科目里也算是佼佼者了。我从来没有和她说我基本上只拿一点点时间学习轻轻松松138分左右波动。高考她情理之中地没考好,只是说上了一本的尾巴,去了一所名不经转的学校学习英语。后来,两年之后的家族聚会见到她,本来就有些天生丽质的她现在浓妆淡抹总相宜,身姿秀美,举手投足之间轻盈优雅,她说她依然每天学很久的英语,看各种英文小说,听各种广播,生活在英语的世界里,对于她已经是天堂。后来听说她在学校和英国交换的项目中认识了一个英国男生,轰轰烈烈地爱了一场,我们以为不着调的时候,她们毕业后就结了婚,此刻她的英语已经说得和母语一样流利了。在各种机缘下,她承担了几次大型项目的同声口译,从此一发不可收拾,在国际名企就职,办外贸公司,人生风生水起,过年时见到她,气质斐然,眉目流转,在我们众多姐妹中十分出众,完全不是十几年前那个苦哈哈的小女孩。而我的英语水平只停留在高中时代了,甚至还遗忘了几个词。当她在帝都的大房子里招待我的时候,我向她倾诉我被不擅长的物理折磨得死去活来,而且鸡肋工作钱少活多,这时候,她的英国老公为她递来了一杯英式奶茶。

是的,小的时候我们总希望自己十项全能,最好是会发光长翅膀的超人,又能斩杀毒龙又能诗词歌赋,文武双全,天下无敌。我们会嘲笑那些成绩差的人,我们也会嘲笑书呆子,似乎那些他们不擅长的领域就代表了他们是很失败很失败的人。我们还会不满意自己,不知道自己为什么那么不聪明,拿不了奥赛金牌,也不知道自己为什么没有天赋,不能跑的比别人快,琴棋书画也是一塌糊涂。于是我们花很多的时间去钻研我们自卑的那些地方,明明肢体不灵活还要学街舞,明明看到数字就犯晕还挑战数学系,明明对体育不感兴趣还游泳羽毛球样样都练,明明喜欢死宅听讲座还偏偏假装热爱旅游最喜欢尼泊尔。看到身边的人兼数职羡慕,看到身边的人插花茶道羡慕,看到身边的人发的间隔年日记羡慕。在别人的炫目的光中迷失了自己,不知道自己的光在哪里,是什么颜色?是的,东学学西看看你总算可以说出咖啡的做法和口味的差别,别人每提一个话题你都可以说上几句。但是,你依然是就那么回事,你写的论文好像还可以,你弹的吉他也是还可以听,你的工作完成也是马马虎虎,甚至有点力不可支。所有的一切都像你的人生,平凡至极,也想超市里面廉价批量出售的碗碟,做工粗糙,歪歪扭扭,图案模糊,被大家挑挑拣拣,勉为其难地买下。你永远搞不清为什么那个碗甚至没有花纹,只是纯白色就可以要价上百,而这只碗造型独特,花纹缤纷,拿在手里很有分量原价二十,最后还打了五折。

我想问问你,你拥有的哪些是你真正喜欢和擅长的?你有没有在这些方面全力以赴让自己光芒四射?你有没有像打磨艺术品的耐心,把自己勇敢地打磨出来?一只跑得最快的乌龟也比不过一个跑得最慢的兔子,但是兔子可不会游泳?即使你用奇淫技巧赢得了几场龟兔赛跑,那也不过是过眼烟云和另一种意义上的掩耳盗铃,不如将这些智慧和技术用在长寿研究和水陆两栖上,随随便便都是佼佼者,稍微用心已经是世界第一。幸福不是多,而是去芜存菁。时间和金钱都是宝贵的成本,我们要用来以最小的投资获得最大的收益。当然,并不是让你驱逐快乐和变得单调,其实做自己擅长的事或者对未来有好处的事本就应该是比做自己做不好的事和无意义的事情来得快乐呀。在这个专业分工越来越精细的社会,我们讲究的是质量,你送给别人一箩筐又小又酸苹果不如送给别人一个又红又大又香甜的苹果。让你光芒四射的永远是你拥有的,正如让方文山被人记住的是他摄人心魄的词而不是歌声,让周杰伦为万千粉丝膜拜的是他音乐的才华而不是长相。那些你无能为力的部分不如放弃掉,从此聚精会神在自己 本身就很不错的地方,假以时日,你肯定会大放异彩。如果有人拿自己的擅长来嘲笑你的不擅长,那么你只需执着努力,达到自己心中的港湾,若因此乱了阵脚,自怨自艾,那么他的话就是你的魔咒,束缚你的快乐和成长,也许有一天你攀登得足够高远再去看他,不过是目光短浅不考虑别人感受的人罢了,甚至是嫉妒你的所有。即使他说的都对,样样比你强,而且遥遥领先,那又如何?你只能做好你自己,你无法变成别人,但是你不会像他一样去嘲笑别人。兰花无需羡慕玫瑰的娇艳姿态,她有她的幽雅暗香。你的本身已足够动人,把自己活出来已经成为光源,温暖世界和他人。 当然你竭尽全力也无法让自己独领风骚,但那又如何呢?你在做着自己喜欢和擅长的事情,一路前进,快乐无比,这本来就光芒四射。

选择自己可以做好的,然后持续为之努力吧!

文/冰菲嫣

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